Tag Archives: pregnancy experience

39 weeks and 2 days and the pregnancy comparison trap

Hey there friends!

I wasn’t feeling a post yesterday because I was insanely uncomfortable on Monday which is when I normally would have written one up.  I may have had an easy 38+ weeks pregnancy, but as of Saturday, things have gotten muy uncomfortable. 

Dec 19 2011 39 weeks

Don’t let my smile fool you, I’m miserable

My back aches.  My pelvic area feels bruised.  There is pressure on my bum.  I feel super large and I’m not sleeping well.  Oh and just an fyi, don’t wear a thong into your 39th week of pregnancy while doing vigorous cardio like I did Monday morning.  It’s not good.  Not good at all.  We’ll leave it at that.

My next doctor’s appt isn’t until the 28th – 2 days after my due date.  Oye.  So I don’t have any real stats to give you, just a check in.

Since maternity leave boredom has officially set in, I’ve been baking and eating a bit more.  And by a bit, I mean a lot.  My sweet tooth wins every battle and I’m going to town on a lot of treats.  Luckily I got to indulge in this guy Monday:

photo(2)

And if you’re wondering, yes I did eat the whole thing.  I impressed myself.  And I wasn’t even remotely hungry for another 8 hours.  We’ll pretend it was loaded with protein.

So besides being generally antsy, I’m getting concerned that Sawyer won’t arrive anytime soon at all and my Mom will miss all of her quality grandson time Sad smile  She arrives tonight (yippeee!) and leaves on the 3rd.  If I have to wait until the 31st for an induction that could be as little as 3 days.  Sigh.  I know they come on their own time, but really, this is just tough!

Each night I go to bed thinking this could be the night my water breaks and then I wake up every morning to nothing having changed.  It’s like Groundhog’s Day.  Though yesterday I think I felt some regular contractions, meaning like 4 an hour.  But who the heck knows. 

The other thing I wanted to touch on is pregnancy comparisons.

I’ve received a few comments over the course of my Baby O posts about my weight, what I choose to wear, etc.  And while none of it is in malice, I did want to address it.

The day I found out I was pregnant, I started googling everything – the most immediate being expected weight gain.  And when I was at 14 weeks or 17 weeks or 25 weeks, I’d google “pregnancy photos XX weeks” just to see if my belly looked like other women.  Why did I do this?  I think to ensure I was on track – not too big and not too small.  Admittedly I hoped to be on the small side. 

And then I’d read blogs or forums about pregnancy experiences.  How could someone still do intense cardio every day of the week and get up at 5am?  Or how the heck does a woman run a marathon while 9 months pregnant when I gave up my piddly little jogs at 14 weeks.  Or how come some husbands were goo-goo-eyed over their baby-to-be when it still hadn’t hit home for my hubby?

While I’ve had a really wonderful pregnancy there are some things that have been less than perfect.  And just to show you that we all experience a range of good and bad, mine are listed below:

Positive:

  • I got pregnant without much effort (about 6 months off birth control with no additional effort / changes)
  • No morning sickness
  • Ability to stay active / exercise
  • No food aversions
  • Primarily weight gain in the belly
  • Decent energy throughout
  • Ability to sleep through the night
  • Healthy progressing baby boy
  • Desire to continue to dress fashionably
  • Friends / family that traveled for baby shower
  • No missed work days
  • No stretch marks (fyi, the only thing I ever used was cheap-o Suave cocoa butter lotion in the AM)
  • Minimal swelling until the end of pregnancy
  • A job and state (Cali) that pays maternity leave

Not so great:

  • Acne.  Every day something new sprouted.
  • Frequent spotting in the first trimester, which had me scared beyond belief
  • Severe mood swings / depression
  • A few extremely low times that were difficult to get out of  and move past
  • A husband who had unbelievably long work hours
  • Lack of ‘sickness’ meant not getting any additional help / sympathy
  • No family nearby at all
  • No hand me downs to capitalize on (from friends / family) which led to a lot of out of pocket expenses
  • A good deal of lower leg swelling starting at 36 weeks
  • Increased anxiety
  • Superhero syndrome and the need to do everything and do it right now
  • Acid reflux after 36 weeks

I’m sure I’m missing some items on both lists, but the point is that we each will experience our own blessings along with misfortunes.  In the end we will have a beautiful baby to love and adore and that trumps both lists. 

Each of us has to choose how we want to live this journey and there is no right or wrong.  So I implore you to not compare, but learn and appreciate the many different paths that we can take to arrive at such a miracle Winking smile

How do you avoid comparisons?

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Pregnancy 1st Trimester: Good, Bad, and Ugly

Let me preface this by saying, being pregnant is the biggest blessing that I could ever have imagined to experience.  That being said, there are some things that I’ve encountered that are less than joyous.  So here’s to being honest about what the first trimester was like Winking smile  [Some graphic TMI items below – you’ve now been warned!]

 

The Good

  • We’re having a baby!  Nothing gets better than that!
  • Seeing the heartbeat
  • Hearing the heartbeat
  • Seeing the little nugget wiggle and move on the ultrasounds
  • Feeling closer than ever to my hubby
  • I have a great excuse not to eat sushi and lunchmeat (because I’m not a fan of either)
  • Motivation to eat ridiculous amounts of protein (70+ grams per day).  It’s super hard, but I like having to focus on this element of my diet that often gets overlooked.
  • No morning sickness for this girl!
  • Ridiculous amounts of sleep.  Sleep is my happy time so I’ll gladly take more.
  • Sharing the news…especially sharing stories with pregnant friends!
  • Fantasizing about the nursery

 

The Bad

  • Spotting.  Talk about anxiety / fear / worry.  I happened to spot about a total of 10 times in my first trimester and while none of it was particularly heavy (or accompanied by cramps), it was scary thinking I was possibly miscarrying.
  • Tender ta-ta’s.  Who knew that they’d hurt so bad?  Sheesh! 
  • Being cold.  All.The.Time.  I run hot by nature, so being cold is foreign to me and I don’t like it.  It drops to low 60’s in the evening in NorCal and I’m about ready to bust out my snowsuit.
  • No more Bikram.  It’s undecided if Bikram is good or bad for prego women, but my doctor recommended I not go.  Sigh.
  • Knowing all the rules!  What can I eat? Can’t I eat?  What meds are okay / not okay?  Can I sit in a hot tub or not?  Yay or nay to massages?  So many rules!
  • Feeling alone in this process.  All family members are thousands of miles away and I can’t help but wonder how this experience would be different (better) with them closer.
  • Picking a name that isn’t already one of top ten most popular names (dangit, Twilight, I liked Isabella!)
  • Severe cramps when working out sometimes: I went for  a run and stopped to take a breath and was doubled over in pain.  The cause?  My uterine ligaments stretching to accommodate my shifting uterus.  Awesome.

 

The Ugly

  • Getting blood drawn.  This is worse than bad because I get the look of death when this happens.  I’ve been pricked 4 times in 8 weeks – that’s more than 10 years worth of blood draws for me!
  • Acne.  Ugh.  My skin looks like a 14 year old.  Yick.  I can’t seem to stay ahead of the lovely friends that keep popping up on my face.
  • Miscarriage statistics.  It’s scary to read that ~30% of women miscarry, and that number could be higher due to the number of unreported incidents of women who don’t know they are pregnant, but miscarry.
  • The lack of vino makes the world an ugly, ugly place Smile with tongue out
  • My super duper cranky pants that I wore 90% of the time over the last several weeks.  Dang hormones.
  • Bloat…there is nothing sexy about bloating up.

And now I’m safely in the 2nd trimester – here’s a shot of me at 15 weeks (my face is getting fuller and confession: I am wearing my pants unbuttoned and keeping them up with a belt…here comes the bump!)

July 5 2011

If you’re pregnant or have been pregnant, any “Good, Bad, Ugly” you want to share?

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